check

How Defensive Are You?

In her book, Taking the War Out of Our Words: The Art of Powerful Non-Defensive Communication, Sharon Ellison estimates that we use 95% of our communications energy being defensive. Indeed, as soon as we feel any threat, either of not getting what we want or of being harmed or put down in some way, we are ready to protect ourselves by being defensive. Imagine how enjoyable our communications could be if we learned how to respond non-defensively and how to avoid provoking defensiveness in others! Take this thriving quiz to see how defensive you tend to be.

Click the button below to start.

Start

Question 1 of 11

When a police officer pulls me over, I’ve always got a “reason” ready for why I was speeding.

A

True

B

False

Question 2 of 11

When people criticize or judge me, I am quick to point out their own faults.

A

True

B

False

Question 3 of 11

I often think, “Can’t others see that I’m not perfect?”

A

True

B

False

Question 4 of 11

If people are upset or disappointed with me, I let them know why they are wrong with explanations and reasons.

A

True

B

False

Question 5 of 11

I’m afraid that what others think of and say about me is true.

A

True

B

False

Question 6 of 11

I’m always looking for the hidden critical message beneath people’s requests.

A

True

B

False

Question 7 of 11

If I don’t defend myself, I’ll just get run over.

A

True

B

False

Question 8 of 11

If I’m open to people’s criticisms and judgments of me, it means I’m weak.

A

True

B

False

Question 9 of 11

I can never admit that I’m wrong.

A

True

B

False

Question 10 of 11

I may not defend myself verbally to someone, but I’ll be sure to get that person back somehow.

A

True

B

False

Question 11 of 11

If I’m at fault for something, it’s always because of some factor outside of myself over which I had no control.

A

True

B

False

Confirm and Submit